Sapporo and Otaru with Grand Park Hotel, Part 4

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OMG I am so freaking tardy with my blog posts!!!

I edited all these pictures a while back but didn't have the time (or diligence) to blog them out until now. Anyway, if you have been reading my blog you will know that a freaking year ago a while back Park Hotel very kindly flew Cheesie and me to both Hongkong and Otaru so we can stay at Park Hotels around the world!

I already blogged 4 posts about this!!

Post 1
Post 2
Post 3
Post 4

So this is the fifth!! The 3rd day we were in Otaru Cheesie suggested we take a train to Sapporo because it is actually very close to Otaru, so off we go!

(Some photos courtesy of Cheesie)


Here's our attire of the day!!

Cheesie has gone entirely into mode fashion (it's like black and edgy) now... She isn't into pastel florally stuff anymore and I'm so super sad about it. I kept wishing she will return to the shore but I accept now that she is gone, just like my fats. Fats, I almost died editing you out of all these pictures. I do not miss you, don't come back.

 Our train tickets


Here's the famous Otaru ferris wheel accompanying us as we wait for our train. Otaru is so scenic and peaceful, I miss it a lot!



Cheesie's wearing my faithful Juicy slippers

Sign outside the Sapporo station!

Thank god Cheesie is so adapt at anything Japanese... Honestly, I am terrified of taking trains in Japan because they are so confusing + I can't speak the language + I have a phobia of being lost in a foreign country. Everytime I've been to Japan I've had people leading me everywhere!

Our first stop is to visit her host parents' house! She did a homestay with them perviously and oh my, they are SO NICE.


Here is Cheesie with her host mom, giving her presents from Malaysia. The host parents are such sweet hospitable people and they don't have any children so they organise homestays to allow foreign kids to stay at their houses...

They would have made SUCH good parents too... My heart breaks just thinking about how they would have loved to have the chance to have kids and grandkids and yet there are people out there abandoning their children or neglecting them for whatever selfish reasons.

Cheesie's host parents love cats and here's one of them rolling on the ground:



Neko, Y U SO kawaii!

We head out for lunch:

Cheesie's host dad... See his shirt haha told you they love cats

RAMEN TIME!! Cheesie's host parents treated us!

Delicious!!

Omg my hair used to be so long -_-


After this host dad drove us to the Maruyama Zoo!!



I have always enjoyed zoos but I can safely say I have never had as much fun as I had in this one!!!!

I know usually zoo blog posts are very boring with "snake sleeping" "tiger sleeping" etc captions and just boring blurry pics of animals but I swear this won't be one of those ok!!


Ok fine my first picture is of a red panda and it IS quite boring, just him standing them looking distinctly unlike how a real panda looks like.

The Maruyama zoo is pretty small unlike our Singapore zoo but it does have a good variety of animals and especially the more winter types which Mandai does not have. Also, the weather was superbly nice that day, like aircon! Loved it!


HERE IS A HIPPO'S BUTT


No seriously, look at this fucking hippo. 

Is there an animal that is funnier-looking than a freaking hippo?

From their name hippopotamus to their stumpy little legs and 3 toed feet to their super fat bellies almost touching the ground to their weeny tail to their little Shrek ears and silly teeth and big mouths... and they are so rotund... I CAN'T EVEN.

The Maruyama zoo had their hippo (and he is GINORMOUS, not the pygmy sort) just walking around the enclosure and you can get pretty darn close to it.

As a city dweller (ok I doubt country dwellers see hippos all the time either) I've never seen a hippo in such close proximity or even walking around out of the water before. I was just stunned by its size and ridiculous appearance. I cannot believe it EXISTS because it so damn weird-looking!!! Can you imagine if it is common like a sparrow and it walks on our streets??

I cannot fully express this feeling of awe when I saw it... You just have to be there to see it for yourself in close proximity to experience this feeling... You always see hippos in graphics or books but to witness it in real life is just stunning.

Just as I was marvelling at the hippo and wondering what sort of God has such a great sense of humour to create a creature like that, the hippo fart, shat and peed at the same time.

HAHHAHAHAHA!!


It farted and had explosive watery diarrhoea come out of its ass and then before the shit finished spraying out it also peed. The trajectory was AMAZING.

It is super MAJOR disgusting and it kept flicking its tail side to side to make sure the shit got sprayed to as wide a range as possible. The entire ground and wall was covered in brown goo. I think it is trying to torture the zookeepers!!

Then it lumbered off to another part of the enclosure like nothing happened.

ARE YOU EVEN SERIOUS?? You already look so damn hilarious and you just had to have SUCH A DRAMATIC SHIT.

Cheesie already moved on to see the next animal so if I didn't remember wrongly she didn't witness the poop. I just stood there laughing non-stop, until the next animal awed me again:


Before I could get over the hippo I see this majestic creature just staring at the hippo from his enclosure. Perhaps it also found the hippo very funny.

I've seen many giraffes before in zoos but never in such proximity so I just never realised how HUGE they are. Such a ridiculous neck... They must have all sorts of neck and back problems with old age.


Pony with a shorter face than Sun Ho. CHINA WINE! CHINA WINE!!


Let me ask you a question...

People always ask... Is a zebra black with white stripes or white with black stripes?

(The correct answer is black with white stripes)

But the question you really want to know is...


IS A ZEBRA'S PENIS WHITE OR BLACK?

(or stripey?)

Place your bets boys and girls, for I have your answer...

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IT IS BLACK!!!

This zebra really fascinated Cheesie and me because it is completely stationary just standing there by itself.

That's all fine but it kept having an erection and shrinking it again and getting erected again and shrinking again... You get the drift.

Like for 5 mins we just stood there watching him alternate his arousal every 5 seconds. WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON IN HIS MIND?!

Maybe this:

"OMG my sister looks so gorgeous I really wanna get it on with her. NO! BAD ZEBRA WHAT ARE YOU THINKING SHE IS YOUR SISTER OMG I NEED TO CLEANSE MY DIRTY MIND THINK OF GRANDMA OR THE HIPPO NEXT DOOR. But... but... my sister is so sexy her stripes are so distinct... OMG NO NO NO HIPPO HIPPO HIPPO HIPPO WITH DIARRHOEA."

Next we go to the brown bear enclosure:


The Japanese are ingenious!!

When we arrived at the enclosure we wondered why so many people were crowding before the glass with their phones and cameras whipped out... It turns out the Hokkaido brown bear was having lunch!!

AND WE ALL HAD SUCH A CLEAR VIEW OF IT!!!

The Japanese placed a pond right next to the glass and in the pond are live fishes! The bear is not fed so in order to get food he has to catch the fish, and we get to see all the action!!

It was so amazing to witness!! Admittedly it is a very small pond but the bear was very quick, diving into the pond and emerging with fish in its teeth.

My whole experience was made even more fun by the enthusiastic Japanese who kept on cheering the bear loudly or going "Ohhhh..." super dramatically when his fishes escape.

Whenever the bear successfully catches a fish and is biting its head off, the Japanese all go "OISHI OISHI!!" in unison! I suppose they understand the bear's love for raw fish. :D

Cheesie took a video!




Next we go to the Polar Bear Enclosure, where we witness something amazing...

Mama polar bear just gave birth and we all saw in clear view her interacting with her baby!!!

I was too busy staring at the too-cute-for-words scene but Cheesie in her enterprising blogging spirit snapped some National Geographic worthy shots:


OMG THOSE PAWS. I also wanna nuzzle baby bear in the belly!!


"Wake up lazy baby!"


 "But mama I wanna sleep in!"


The paw pads... I cannot maintain!!!!!!!

Ok end of this entry! I try to blog part 5 asap! :D

THANK YOU PARK HOTEL GROUP FOR ONE OF THE BEST HOLIDAYS IN MY LIFE!!